Breathing in
Breathing in
Breathing in
uhwhoooo Breathing out
I am barely breathing
I am broken inside
such fear
Tears
The Pain is not subsiding
I thought I knew
I thought I understood
Who am I
Is it sad - I have tasted that the Lord is gracious and struggle with His favor
He is always the same, I am ever changing
He is forever loving , I am arrogantly trusting
choice.... - to what
Conform to His image
correct my flesh
His hand outstretched and waiting
Choice
Desire - but what
the pure milk of the word
Lies of the flesh - soft lust
lay aside and rid yourself of all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking
Every Thought into submission, let not a drop of iniquity pass your lips
the pain it burns
Choice
Rejected by man
I am precious, called out of darkness Chosen by God
Behold I cannot be put to shame
All Glory to God
Choice
ease
Temporal acceptance
Bumbling fool, Stumbling
I can build on this cornerstone disobedient with pleasure - The willing flesh
Struggling waring against my flesh - Honor among Gentiles - Death to my soul
anointed in Marvelous light - blissful in purposeful darkness
Choice
Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king.
Honor self - Love lust - Fear nothing - Praise iniquity
Death or Glory
Choice
Thursday, August 7, 2008
What makes you think that I am like you
What makes you think that I am like you
because my face looks like yours
Because I have breath that i breath
well I am not like you
I do not see the world through eyes like yours
I will not see with out God
I will not let my judgments be made by what I alone see
I cannot let my values be shaped by this circle of life
I will not let The failures of men keep me from seeking His face
When I fail miserably I force my hands and will praise Him with all I have.
When I make a fool of myself I will fall on my face and bare witness to His faithfulness
We are confined to a finite time domain while housed with in these prisons but out side of our selves our spirits will fill the heavenlies and transverse the infinite dimensions of existence so when you say oh she is just like .........
Stop, stop yourself short & think, For I am unlike the countless you see before your eyes, I am the same as you, I am nobody but Christ Lives in me, I had nothing, I am nothing, I am a survivor, an over-comer, an extraordinary machine oiled , fueled, run and directed by God and striving to fulfill my desire to be the Bond servant of God.
because my face looks like yours
Because I have breath that i breath
well I am not like you
I do not see the world through eyes like yours
I will not see with out God
I will not let my judgments be made by what I alone see
I cannot let my values be shaped by this circle of life
I will not let The failures of men keep me from seeking His face
When I fail miserably I force my hands and will praise Him with all I have.
When I make a fool of myself I will fall on my face and bare witness to His faithfulness
We are confined to a finite time domain while housed with in these prisons but out side of our selves our spirits will fill the heavenlies and transverse the infinite dimensions of existence so when you say oh she is just like .........
Stop, stop yourself short & think, For I am unlike the countless you see before your eyes, I am the same as you, I am nobody but Christ Lives in me, I had nothing, I am nothing, I am a survivor, an over-comer, an extraordinary machine oiled , fueled, run and directed by God and striving to fulfill my desire to be the Bond servant of God.
Self... I will not let you Die
Who can say it
How easy is it really
so long self
Hello........ goodbye
Self I will not let you die
Hello, softly you caress our ego
tenderly, I whisper everything I need to hear,
Smiling I know you'll fight for me too, it is nice to know someone will fight for meNever letting go- who could resist that kind of love, tenderly your playing my soul
Hello so long I have to let go
Your just my lies feeding my emotions..... Now for real goodbyyyyyye
I found true Love that cannot tell a lie
Peace feverishly burning deep inside - pricking me - calling me - urging me to follow close behind -
Gently showing me Powers far beyond a calling
echoing in the distance
running by
I only know you by your love -
I want to run and shout shackles shed
never hiding
I am here
right behind smiling -
heart racing what could be this
Divine
I heard of you once before but you were Just their dreams - Delusions wondering in reality -
Hello,
but
I cannot say goodbye
tearing my life apart
me runs wild
feeling everything there is to feel - Knowing you are trying to keep something from me
tippy toeing past my shame
NO
I will not Go - You are mine and there is nothing to be ashamed of -
living every moment who could blame me, I am mine
Who can say so long self
Hello........ goodbye
I cannot let you die
bowing my head in the shadows of pain I realize this time,........., I am not my own, I have been bought with a price.
How easy is it really
so long self
Hello........ goodbye
Self I will not let you die
Hello, softly you caress our ego
tenderly, I whisper everything I need to hear,
Smiling I know you'll fight for me too, it is nice to know someone will fight for meNever letting go- who could resist that kind of love, tenderly your playing my soul
Hello so long I have to let go
Your just my lies feeding my emotions..... Now for real goodbyyyyyye
I found true Love that cannot tell a lie
Peace feverishly burning deep inside - pricking me - calling me - urging me to follow close behind -
Gently showing me Powers far beyond a calling
echoing in the distance
running by
I only know you by your love -
I want to run and shout shackles shed
never hiding
I am here
right behind smiling -
heart racing what could be this
Divine
I heard of you once before but you were Just their dreams - Delusions wondering in reality -
Hello,
but
I cannot say goodbye
tearing my life apart
me runs wild
feeling everything there is to feel - Knowing you are trying to keep something from me
tippy toeing past my shame
NO
I will not Go - You are mine and there is nothing to be ashamed of -
living every moment who could blame me, I am mine
Who can say so long self
Hello........ goodbye
I cannot let you die
bowing my head in the shadows of pain I realize this time,........., I am not my own, I have been bought with a price.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Kinetic Strings of Gods Heart
"You'll never understand" myself says.
"NO" my spirit calls out
You are His and a Saint to the Lord
He has given each of His own- the vision and wisdom according to their faith.
You can understand if you seek it.
For you are no Longer called servant but Friend
Then I should wait for confirmation as taught through His word.
"But Father"
"BUT?" No my child there is no But
"Father" there is yet another problem
I have no patience
my emotion, instant gratification, my rational flesh is so strong, there, here in this moment and time
I am not strong enough to overcome the thoughts of doubt!
I cannot
it is so overwhelming this waiting,
the unknown.
My security has always been my knowledge of knowing. Comprehending
"Why have you then blinded me my King?"
Yes Child ask
Always question.
Learn to love the breath I breathed into the nostrils of Adam.
Breaking you down, out of your comfort.
Drained, scared yet unafraid
I release,let go and relax like a marionette inert and genteelly manipulated by the Kinetic Strings of Gods Heart
"NO" my spirit calls out
You are His and a Saint to the Lord
He has given each of His own- the vision and wisdom according to their faith.
You can understand if you seek it.
For you are no Longer called servant but Friend
Then I should wait for confirmation as taught through His word.
"But Father"
"BUT?" No my child there is no But
"Father" there is yet another problem
I have no patience
my emotion, instant gratification, my rational flesh is so strong, there, here in this moment and time
I am not strong enough to overcome the thoughts of doubt!
I cannot
it is so overwhelming this waiting,
the unknown.
My security has always been my knowledge of knowing. Comprehending
"Why have you then blinded me my King?"
Yes Child ask
Always question.
Learn to love the breath I breathed into the nostrils of Adam.
Breaking you down, out of your comfort.
Drained, scared yet unafraid
I release,let go and relax like a marionette inert and genteelly manipulated by the Kinetic Strings of Gods Heart
Love? Is it that He Knew
How hard it is ...life
To hear their tears all your pain,
Why must I endure their voices
Come hold my hand
Let me take it all from you
My strength is He that dwells in me and I can endure for you
My sorrow strikes my soul
All the wickedness of flesh revealed in a moment’s time
How hard it is....
Come hold my hand I can try, to stand in the gap
How much more sorrow must the Lord of Host feel
How is it that He can rejoice at His Children’s sorrow?
Is it that He Knows?
The beginning from the end and as He holds every tear in His hand, He thinks of your end the beginning with Him
And for that He sent the savior?
While we were yet sinners He died for a beginning without end
Not just you and I
Not just for the just
But for Manson and Bin Landen for Chester and Mother Theresa
How my finite mind struggles to comprehend
It is you I should lift up and interceded for
It is for all I should lay down my life and am beckoned to my knees.
Sometimes I cannot feel myself
Overwhelmed with the wickedness of man and how I long to love your soul as he loves mine.
How hard it is.....The Flesh
How kind He is..... The spirit
Can we hold hands and I bend to you just this once setting aside the flesh wipe away your tears with my hair and wash your weary feet
Come to me as the Servant King has come to me
I am sorry you are depraved and wickedness has overcome you
Such sadness I know that could have been me
Oh depraved and perverted, I am sorry that I have not be there for you and help you to over come
I am sorry to you mother and grandfather that I can not take your place at the judgment hour
But be thee grateful for I am but human a broken vessel
Yet He the King of Kings believes in you and calls for you to come just as you are. Standing in the Gap for those who answer the call
Interceding and covering you at judgment hour.
But for now
I hear your tears near and far I bow my head and lay myself at your feet
Much Love
To hear their tears all your pain,
Why must I endure their voices
Come hold my hand
Let me take it all from you
My strength is He that dwells in me and I can endure for you
My sorrow strikes my soul
All the wickedness of flesh revealed in a moment’s time
How hard it is....
Come hold my hand I can try, to stand in the gap
How much more sorrow must the Lord of Host feel
How is it that He can rejoice at His Children’s sorrow?
Is it that He Knows?
The beginning from the end and as He holds every tear in His hand, He thinks of your end the beginning with Him
And for that He sent the savior?
While we were yet sinners He died for a beginning without end
Not just you and I
Not just for the just
But for Manson and Bin Landen for Chester and Mother Theresa
How my finite mind struggles to comprehend
It is you I should lift up and interceded for
It is for all I should lay down my life and am beckoned to my knees.
Sometimes I cannot feel myself
Overwhelmed with the wickedness of man and how I long to love your soul as he loves mine.
How hard it is.....The Flesh
How kind He is..... The spirit
Can we hold hands and I bend to you just this once setting aside the flesh wipe away your tears with my hair and wash your weary feet
Come to me as the Servant King has come to me
I am sorry you are depraved and wickedness has overcome you
Such sadness I know that could have been me
Oh depraved and perverted, I am sorry that I have not be there for you and help you to over come
I am sorry to you mother and grandfather that I can not take your place at the judgment hour
But be thee grateful for I am but human a broken vessel
Yet He the King of Kings believes in you and calls for you to come just as you are. Standing in the Gap for those who answer the call
Interceding and covering you at judgment hour.
But for now
I hear your tears near and far I bow my head and lay myself at your feet
Much Love
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Over Extended
My heart swells with Grief
I cannot even find my heart
I feel the tears fall, the warmth of their pain
But where is my warm heart
Why is it breaking, when I cannot even find it
Your so far away
So lost from even yourself
And yet I see you
I can feel your warmth, your heart, your pain
I see you contort and agonize
I reach out
You slap my hand
Bad Girl
Bad Baby
Now Now go on, mind your own business
I can’t see through the glaze of my eyes
The Pain of my Gut, sinking and dazed I reach out
Where are you, I call out wondering and ashamed
You don’t come
Wait…… I feel you I knew you would come
Wait ……. You feel strange sadness
Who is this
I find My Lords Hand…..
Pull it to my head
Like a Monkey looking for grooming
God pulls me close I nuzzle in press in
He pets my head Stroking me Like a father does His Child
Rest, Fear not
The tears flow so lovingly pouring into His lap so strong like they will never end
My heart there it is
Reaching out to you
To cover your pain
With my love
Your so far away
Do you recognize who you are
Do you remember your Dreams
Do you remember a time when there was only the world at your finger tips, did you ever feel that way
Your so beautiful
Such an Amazing creation
Lost in lies
Hopeless and sad
Scared and alone
Can I reach out to Love you My friend
Anger, self righteous pride, Self condemnation filled with the pain and lies of this world gone bad
Recoiled I grow distant and faint
Confused, My flesh burns with disappointment and hurt
Words bring death, Words are power
Control………………
Wait
be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit
Words Yes Words bring life
Words bring Hope
Words bind
Words up rise
Words encourage
Filled with Love, peace beyond human understanding, strength of the spirit not the Flesh
Lean not unto My understanding but Gods who ways are Higher than Mine. Living by faith not by sight
Love it loves always standing on the promises of God not that of the worlds who would have me walk away
Control, Power, Words, Choice
I will give and when I am empty I will lay my head back into the lap of my one and only father and let Him pour His spirit into filling me with His love empting myself of Me,
So long Self there is no room for you here in this temple of the Lord.
I reach out
I cannot even find my heart
I feel the tears fall, the warmth of their pain
But where is my warm heart
Why is it breaking, when I cannot even find it
Your so far away
So lost from even yourself
And yet I see you
I can feel your warmth, your heart, your pain
I see you contort and agonize
I reach out
You slap my hand
Bad Girl
Bad Baby
Now Now go on, mind your own business
I can’t see through the glaze of my eyes
The Pain of my Gut, sinking and dazed I reach out
Where are you, I call out wondering and ashamed
You don’t come
Wait…… I feel you I knew you would come
Wait ……. You feel strange sadness
Who is this
I find My Lords Hand…..
Pull it to my head
Like a Monkey looking for grooming
God pulls me close I nuzzle in press in
He pets my head Stroking me Like a father does His Child
Rest, Fear not
The tears flow so lovingly pouring into His lap so strong like they will never end
My heart there it is
Reaching out to you
To cover your pain
With my love
Your so far away
Do you recognize who you are
Do you remember your Dreams
Do you remember a time when there was only the world at your finger tips, did you ever feel that way
Your so beautiful
Such an Amazing creation
Lost in lies
Hopeless and sad
Scared and alone
Can I reach out to Love you My friend
Anger, self righteous pride, Self condemnation filled with the pain and lies of this world gone bad
Recoiled I grow distant and faint
Confused, My flesh burns with disappointment and hurt
Words bring death, Words are power
Control………………
Wait
be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit
Words Yes Words bring life
Words bring Hope
Words bind
Words up rise
Words encourage
Filled with Love, peace beyond human understanding, strength of the spirit not the Flesh
Lean not unto My understanding but Gods who ways are Higher than Mine. Living by faith not by sight
Love it loves always standing on the promises of God not that of the worlds who would have me walk away
Control, Power, Words, Choice
I will give and when I am empty I will lay my head back into the lap of my one and only father and let Him pour His spirit into filling me with His love empting myself of Me,
So long Self there is no room for you here in this temple of the Lord.
I reach out
Once I Did
Yeah just to be loved
I wonder what that is like
Sometimes I see it
Sometimes I think I can obtain it
I once believed I could be loved
I once believed in innocence and forever
Yeah to be loved
To be seen
To always know they will be there
Someone who thinks there is no one like you
Yeah to be loved I promise that wherever you may go Wherever life may lead With all my heart I'll be there too From this moment on I want you to know I'll let nothing come between us And I will love the ones you love
Yeah once I did believe
I wonder what that is like
Sometimes I see it
Sometimes I think I can obtain it
I once believed I could be loved
I once believed in innocence and forever
Yeah to be loved
To be seen
To always know they will be there
Someone who thinks there is no one like you
Yeah to be loved I promise that wherever you may go Wherever life may lead With all my heart I'll be there too From this moment on I want you to know I'll let nothing come between us And I will love the ones you love
Yeah once I did believe
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